I've decided that there is a wild animal that lives only in the mountainous regions of West Virginia called the feral Stank Poon. It's about the size of two housecats fucking (regular sized ones, not fat-ass ones), has long-ish matted dirty-grey / brown hair, a flat tail, and two pointy buck teeth which it uses for gnawing through mailbox posts. It sleeps hanging by one paw from tree branches, makes a gutteral moaning sound (not unlike the sound a fork makes when you "accidentally" drop it into a running garbage disposal) when fornicating, and has been known to drop from trees onto the unsuspecting heads of hikers just to steal their trail mix.
And in case you've ever wondered what the sex act of farting into a woman's vagina is called, it's a "Hot Queef Injection".
Your move, Google Ads.
