I've spent the past two years exploring myself as well as New England, taking long solitary motorcycle rides throughout the woods and mountains, staying in and exploring towns, and generally being the typical lonor motorcyclist. I've quite enjoyed it - the freedom from being out there on your own and going where you want when you want is exhilarating on its own, and I've made tons of single-serving friends and learned about myself and the world we live in along the way.
But yesterday I went for a ride and hiked the trails at Black Rock State Park here in CT and I realized that while I did enjoy the day, I had a nagging feeling of discomfort that I couldn't quite shake. At one point I paused in the woods and looked around me in the absolute silence that only comes after disturbing the status quo by trudging through the pine leaves in your boots - when squirrels and birds and foxes all freeze in place, waiting to see what you are going to do next. At that moment I realized the source of my discomfort was loneliness, something I had grown accustomed to through my travels.
Last week I started a new job - one where I actually have to go onto the office every day instead of sitting at home by myself in my underwear. I made some new friends and now interact with people pretty much all day long. The two days before my hike I spent up north with F.M. - we went out to dinner together, chilled out at a house party and had some fun conversations with some really cool people, and took a nice motorcycle ride up the coast and enjoyed the last weekend day of summer together. I think that what I realized yesterday is that all of this has reminded me just how much I enjoy other people and being around them. There's something comforting about knowing that a conversation or experience is part of a bigger picture instead of the entirety of your interaction with a person.
And experiencing what life has to offer with someone else makes it just a bit more colorful, a bit more full, and a bit more real.
So thank you F.M., for choosing to spend a wonderful weekend with me - I really can't think of any other better way to send off summer. And to my friends in Orlando, Miami, Seattle, Boston, and the U.K. - I thank you also for your friendship, which I am really just realizing the value of now. While you may find yourself under a rock or tucked away in the woods somewhere, the image reflected back at you from someone else's smiling eyes in the middle of a conversation or while experiencing a little bit of life together is priceless.
